The Day I Decide to Change My Life

An old post I found hidden on my laptop – I guess sometimes things do change for the better. #feelingcontent “So, what happens when things aren’t really going your way? Someone in your life isn’t fulfilling your needs, your goals aren’t being accomplished as easily, or you have the realization that adulting is a real thing and maybe you aren’t so good at it.   Quite frankly, I have such high expectations of people and things. I always hope that people will put in the effort that I desire or that a situation will bring me joy and happiness. And of course, those things never really happen 100% of the time.   Costa Rica is amazing and some days are better than others. Sometimes I am really sick of the 75% humidity, the catcalling, the bugs, the rice &beans. Other days I find myself in a magical part of the […]

I’m Struggling

Flashing back to my younger life to set the stage a little, I was and still am a huge people pleaser. My life feels a little incomplete when people “don’t like me” or don’t try as hard in the friendship/relationship. I take it personally and view it as if it’s because of something I have done or if there is something wrong with me. I take it so personally that I stay up many nights internally sad because I am constantly trying to make everyone like me and it just never works. I am trying to go so far out of my way to make things easier for others and to force all these friendships. And that makes me sad. So as people close to me may know last fall semester was really hard for me. I found myself struggling with many thoughts and decisions internally, and thus, I found myself […]

Why Not Knowing What You Want May Not Be So Bad After All

My dad told me “Quit being so wishy-washy, you’ll regret it.” I kind of give it to him for the “you’ll regret it part,” only because I stress out everyone in my life & who wouldn’t regret that? Other than that, there are very few personal regrets. During my childhood I dreamt of becoming an actress (because I am so overly dramatic it pains me). I took a shot at being an artist, until I realized I couldn’t draw more than what looked like a potato. I entertained the idea of teaching until I made my brother cry because I am too bossy. Then I realized my true calling of becoming an aquatic veterinarian. Until I realized like two jobs exist in that field. That quickly changed to dreaming of being a Victoria’s Secret Angel. After coming to terms with reality, I turned to wanting to join the Air Force as […]

Stop saying my major is easy…

I am a broadcasting major and journalism minor, and they are not “easy” areas of study. Any time someone asks what I am majoring in I tell them with pride because I love what I do. But then I notice that there is usually a strange look on their face. When I ask someone what they are studying I usually hear something in the STEM field so to them broadcasting and journalism seem like easy ways out. I am sick of feeling ashamed to tell people what I am studying because I pour my heart and soul in what I do. Just because I am not taking four biology and chemistry classes a semester does not mean my major is easy. If you didn’t like writing you probably wouldn’t be overly excited to write a book for a final project; but I am. I am just so over the strange looks and […]

Acting Like You Don’t Care Won’t Stop You From Getting Heartbroken

  I am going to be honest here: I am known for putting up walls and acting like I don’t care to prevent heartbreak. The harsh reality of this is that it makes things worse. Everyone is fighting their own battles and has a history that has scarred them, but living in fear of history repeating itself doesn’t help you, it just hurts your chance of something not working out. Here’s why. A person can only stick around for so long when you aren’t giving them anything in return. This is kind of obvious, but if you’re not putting forth the same amount of effort or interest then they are going to think you are just not that into them. You could think they are amazing, but they aren’t going to wait around forever for you to let down your walls and actually make them feel wanted. You could miss […]